## Behold! The AI Pony That Barely Clears a Teacup
Right, let’s talk about this… *thing*. This new language model everyone’s apparently losing their collective minds over. Apparently, it’s a revolutionary leap forward in artificial intelligence. Really? Seriously? Because last I checked, revolutions involved things like overthrowing oppressive regimes and discovering penicillin, not generating slightly more coherent grocery lists than your toaster oven.
They’re touting its open nature as some kind of magnificent achievement. Open! As if the previous models weren’t already spewing forth a torrent of mostly-accurate information interspersed with unsettlingly convincing lies. Now it’s *open*? Fantastic. More readily accessible for anyone to weaponize, misunderstand, or just generally annoy us all into an early grave. Wonderful.
It can run on… what? A moderately powerful laptop? That’s the pinnacle of innovation now? We moved from needing room-sized supercomputers to a device that plays Candy Crush and also occasionally writes vaguely poetic descriptions of sunsets. Progress!
And the size! Twelve billion parameters – it’s practically a miniature digital elephant! Yet, when you ask it to explain quantum physics, it produces something resembling a particularly confused squirrel attempting interpretive dance. It’s like they shrunk a horse down to be the size of a hamster, declared it “remarkable,” and then expected it to pull a plow.
Honestly, the hype surrounding this tiny digital pony is just… exhausting. Let’s all celebrate its modest existence. Let us bow before its ability to string together sentences that aren’t *completely* nonsensical. Truly, a marvel of modern engineering. I need a nap.
