In a world where breaking world records is considered a legitimate profession, one man has risen above the rest – David Rush. Rush, a serial record-breaker, has made it his life’s mission to achieve something great. Luckily for him, the criteria for what constitutes “great” is pretty broad.
On a recent episode of “Live with Kelly and Mark,” Rush took on his latest challenge – catching the most balls on a Velcro suit in one minute. Yes, you read that correctly. A grown man dressed head to toe in Velcro, waiting for small balls to come flying at him.
It’s hard to imagine how this idea was born. Did Rush one day look at his Velcro wall and think, “You know what would be even better? If I was the Velcro wall.” Either way, here we are.
As the clock counted down, Rush stood with arms outstretched, like a human flytrap, waiting for the hail of balls to come raining down. The intensity was palpable. The crowd was on the edge of their seats. Mark and Kelly looked on, no doubt wondering how they got themselves into this.
The first ball was tossed with a flick of the wrist – a gentle toss designed to ease Rush into the chaos that would ensue. But as the seconds ticked by, the tosses became harder and faster. Rush’s Velcro suit was put to the test, as he spun around and reached up to catch the balls flying at him from every angle.
It’s an inspiring image, really. A true testament to what the human spirit can achieve. Who needs world peace or ending poverty when you can catch a bunch of balls while dressed like a wall?
As the minute came to a close, it was clear that Rush had achieved something great. He caught a whopping 51 balls in 60 seconds. A new world record. Mark and Kelly couldn’t contain their excitement. Rush couldn’t contain his sweat.
The victory was short-lived, however. As Rush stripped off his Velcro suit and wiped the sweat from his brow, it became clear that his obsession with breaking records had taken a toll. The bags under his eyes were a little darker, his hair a little thinner, his smile a little forced.
It’s no secret that Rush has sacrificed a lot in the pursuit of his dreams. His family, his health, his dignity. But hey, at least he has a lot of plaques.
As the show came to a close, Rush was hailed a hero. The man who could catch balls with the very fabric of his being. The man who proved that anything is possible if you’re willing to wear a giant Velcro onesie. Truly, he is an inspiration to us all. Or at least to those of us with a craving for attention and a high tolerance for humiliation.
