**BREAKING: OTTERGEDDON HITS WISCONSIN ZOO AS FURRY FUGITIVES WREAK HAVOC**
In a shocking turn of events, a group of mischievous otters broke free from their enclosure at the Wisconsin Zoo during a snowstorm of epic proportions. The incident has left zoo officials scrambling to round up the cunning critters, who have reportedly taken over the city.
Eyewitnesses claim that the otters, whose names are allegedly “Ollie,” “Otis,” and “Ottilie,” staged a daring escape at approximately 3:00 AM, when the snowstorm was at its most intense. The trio was seen swimming through the frozen moat, using their webbed feet to propel themselves through the icy waters.
“I was driving to work when I saw them,” said local resident, Jane Doe. “At first, I thought it was just a bunch of raccoons, but then I saw their little faces and I was like, ‘Oh no, it’s the otters!’ They were like little furry ninjas, sneaking around and causing chaos.”
The otters have reportedly taken over the city’s downtown area, causing widespread destruction and mayhem. They have been spotted raiding local businesses, stealing fish from the market, and even hijacking a snowplow.
“We’re doing our best to contain the situation,” said Zoo spokesperson, John Smith. “But these otters are like little Houdinis. They seem to be always one step ahead of us.”
As the search for the otters continues, residents are being advised to stay indoors and keep a close eye on their snacks.
“We’re not sure what they’re looking for, but we suspect it’s something to do with cheese,” said Smith. “We’ve had reports of them raiding a local pizzeria and making off with a tray of mozzarella sticks.”
The otters’ demands have been issued, and they are seeking:
* A lifetime supply of fish sticks
* A private ice rink
* And a guarantee that no one will try to put a sweater on them
The situation is ongoing, and this is not a drill. If you see the otters, do not approach them. Instead, call the Wisconsin Zoo’s Otter Hotline at 555-OTTER-911.
**UPDATE:** The otters have just released a statement, claiming they are “just trying to live their best lives” and that they will only return to their enclosure when the cheese supply runs out.
Stay tuned for further updates on this developing story.
