**BREAKING: Rogue Raccoons Wreak Havoc on Wisconsin Household, Don Masks to Evade Capture**
In a bizarre incident that has left residents of a quiet Wisconsin neighborhood scratching their heads, a group of mischievous raccoons was caught red-handed (or red-pawed) breaking into a local home, only to be thwarted by their own cunning.
According to eyewitnesses, the masked marauders – yes, they were actually wearing masks – gained entry to the residence through an open window and made themselves at home, helping themselves to a midnight snack of Cheetos and leftover pizza.
“I was awoken by the sound of rustling wrappers and what sounded like a chorus of ‘Om nom nom’s’,” said homeowner, Jane Doe. “I crept into the kitchen and was shocked to see a group of raccoons, dressed in what looked like miniature bandits’ masks, rummaging through my pantry.”
The raccoons, estimated to be around six in number, were reportedly well-coordinated and worked together to evade capture. They even set up a makeshift “security system” using a toy walkie-talkie to alert each other to potential threats.
“I tried to shoo them away, but they just gave me a sassy little nod and continued snacking,” said Doe. “It was like they were trying to out-hipster me.”
However, their clever plan was ultimately foiled when one of the raccoons got stuck in a cheese puff bag, prompting the others to abandon their loot and make a hasty retreat.
“I managed to sneak up behind them and corral them into a laundry basket,” said Doe, who captured the raccoons and released them back into the wild. “I have to admit, it was kind of impressive how they worked together. Maybe they were planning a heist?”
The raccoons, who have been named “Rocky,” “Ricky,” “Rico,” “Ralph,” “Roderick,” and “Ricky-Roo,” have become local celebrities, with many residents calling for their release from “prison” (the laundry basket).
When asked for comment, a local wildlife expert said, “It’s not uncommon for raccoons to get a little too comfortable in human spaces, but the masks? That’s just ridiculous. I mean, who needs that kind of drama in their life?”
The incident has left many in the community wondering: what’s next for these cunning critters? Will they start a raccoon mafia? Only time (and possibly a sequel heist) will tell.
