**BREAKING: DEADLY SNAKE FOUND HIDING INSIDE LAWN MOWER, EXPERTS BAFFLED BY ITS OBVIOUS DESIRE FOR LAWN CARE**
In a bizarre incident that has left residents of suburban Anytown, USA reeling, a massive, deadly snake was discovered hiding inside a lawn mower in a quiet cul-de-sac.
The snake, identified as a 20-foot-long, 500-pound Burmese python with a taste for…well, lawn care, was found coiled up and apparently content inside the lawn mower, surrounded by tangled blades of grass and what appeared to be a half-eaten bag of fertilizer.
“I was just getting ready to mow the lawn when I heard a strange hissing noise coming from the mower,” said local resident and eyewitness, John Smith. “I lifted up the lid and that’s when I saw it – this enormous snake just staring back at me, looking all…green and slithery. I mean, I’ve seen some weird things in my time, but this was just ridiculous.”
According to experts, the snake, which has been named “Lawnzilla” by local authorities, appears to have an unquenchable thirst for lawn care and a passion for precision cutting.
“It’s like it has a Ph.D. in lawn maintenance or something,” said Dr. Jane Wilson, a leading expert in reptilian behavior. “We’ve never seen anything like it. The snake seems to have an innate understanding of lawn mower mechanics and a desire to achieve the perfect cut.”
As authorities work to safely remove Lawnzilla from the lawn mower and relocate it to a more suitable environment, residents of Anytown are left wondering how this deadly snake ended up in their quiet neighborhood.
“I mean, we’ve had some weird things happen in this town before, but this is just crazy,” said local resident, Jane Doe. “I just hope it doesn’t start a lawn care business on the side. I hear it’s very competitive out there.”
In related news, lawn care services in Anytown have seen a significant spike in demand, with many residents opting for snake-proof lawn mowers and emergency lawn care hotlines.
**UPDATE:** Lawnzilla has issued a statement expressing its desire to start a lawn care business and has begun accepting clients in the area.
