**British Brothers Crowned Unofficial Masters of the Pokémon Universe with World’s Largest Card Collection**
In what can only be described as a monumental achievement in the annals of human history, two British brothers from Canterbury have recently unveiled their astonishing collection of Pokémon cards, cementing their place as the world’s foremost Pokémon connoisseurs. With a staggering 20,000 cards neatly housed in an elaborate storage system that suspiciously resembles a first-grade art project gone awry, the brothers have managed to achieve the type of fame typically reserved for rock stars and Nobel laureates.
Meet James and Oliver Hawthorne, ages 27 and 25, who clearly have their priorities in perfect alignment. While most people their age are busy venturing into the working world, battling student loans, and engaging in adult responsibilities like, you know, paying taxes, these lucky gents opted for the path less traveled: pursuing the illustrious dream of catching ‘em all—albeit through trading cards instead of Pokémon battles.
The brothers claim to have begun their collection back in 2003, shortly after the franchise began to gain notoriety, exclusively to make the rest of us feel either jealous or utterly confused. According to James, “It was never about the money or the fame; it was about proving to the world that we could have all the Charizards in existence and that no one could take that away from us!” Indeed, nothing says self-actualization quite like a cardboard silhouette of a fire-breathing dragon.
Oliver, the younger sibling and apparently the “creative mastermind” behind the collection, explained the painstaking process of acquiring the cards. “We’ve been to over 1,000 card shops, conventions, and eBay listings. It’s basically like a full-time job, minus the health benefits, a salary, and any form of social life.” The brothers also lamented that their weekends spent hunting down holographic Pikachus didn’t quite lean into the romantic notion of adulthood they were led to believe would happen post-high school.
In a groundbreaking twist of events, the Hawthornes discovered the secret to skyrocketing their card collection: leveraging the internet. “We just Googled ‘how to collect Pokémon cards,’ and it was like a whole new world opened up,” James enthused, punctuating the statement with an earnest gleam in his eye. Clearly, decades of wisdom gained through traditional knitting circles and stamp collecting don’t measure up to learning the fine art of refresh button clicking.
Naturally, the brothers have been approached by various media outlets to showcase their impressive collection, further adding to their apparent celebrity status. “It feels amazing!” exclaimed Oliver, as he posted another photo of the collection on social media, captioned with “Living my best life!” while surrounded by ten thousand cards that state, “You’re not going to ever grow up.”
The brothers have plans to take their collection to the next level by hosting conventions where other adults can come together, trade cards, and discuss the intricate lore of a children’s franchise in utmost seriousness. “It’s basically a networking event, but instead of job opportunities, it’s concentrated nostalgia,” Oliver declared.
So, as the Hawthorne brothers prepare to take the world by storm with their Poké-powerhouse, we salute them for their exceptional triumphs in an arena that most would consider a nostalgic footnote. Bravo, lads! You are indeed the societal role models we never knew we needed.
