School Sets Off 2,013 Confetti Cannons Because… Why Not?
In a move that has left the world scratching its head and wondering what on earth is wrong with Australia, a school in the land Down Under has set off a mind-boggling 2,013 confetti cannons all at once to celebrate its 40th anniversary. Yes, really.
The event, held at the school in question – which, for the record, shall remain nameless, since we don’t want to give them any more publicity than they already have – was apparently designed to break a Guinness World Record. Because, as we all know, there’s nothing quite like firing off a bunch of confetti cannons to make you feel like a true champion of the world.
Now, we don’t want to be negative Nancy’s here, but we have to ask: was it really necessary to set off OVER TWO THOUSAND confetti cannons just to celebrate a school anniversary? We mean, we get it – it’s a big milestone and all – but surely there are more productive ways to commemorate this occasion?
Maybe the school could have invested in some new textbooks? Or, perhaps, donated some of that confetti cannon money to a local charity?
But no, apparently launching colorful streamers everywhere is the best way to mark the occasion. Which begs the question: do they not care about the environment? Can you imagine the mess that all that paper and plastic will cause?
We’re pretty sure future generations will be cursing the day that school decided to celebrate their anniversary with a literal bang.
To make matters worse (or better, depending on your perspective), the school also managed to break a Guinness World Record in the process. And what was that record, you ask? Most confetti cannons set up in one take.
Yes, folks, you read that correctly. This school in Australia now holds the esteemed title of “Most Confetti Cannons Set off in One Take”. Which, we suppose, is a pretty impressive accomplishment if you’re into that sort of thing.
But we can’t help but feel like there are more worthwhile world records to be broken. Like, say, most money raised for charity in one day? Or most people volunteering at a local shelter? Or even most hamburgers eaten in one sitting?
But no, apparently shooting confetti all over the place is the new gold standard for world records. Good on you, guys.
In conclusion, while we can’t help but question the idea of using confetti cannons to celebrate a school anniversary, we have to admit that the school students seem to be having a great time. They’ll probably be picking bits of glitter out of their hair for months to come, but hey, at least they can say they were there when their school made history.
So, congratulations, nameless school in Australia. You may not have made the world a better place, but you’ve certainly made it a more colorful one.
