Lucky Duck Gets Another Chance at Life with Second Lottery Win
MARYLAND – In an inspiring turn of events that is sure to leave the rest of us playing the lottery looking like total suckers, a local man has managed to snag his second big win, in the form of a $50,000 check.
Yes, you read that right. This wasn’t his first rodeo, and yet this lucky duck still managed to come out on top.
“I couldn’t believe it, man,” said the winner, whose name we won’t bother to include – why give anyone else the chance to stalk him down and beg for crumb? “I mean, I had a good feeling about it, obviously, but I never expected to win twice!”
We managed to track down some of the man’s friends and family, who weren’t exactly shy about weighing in on their thoughts about it all.
“I always knew he was a lucky son of a gun,” said his mother, who seemed well-pleased with the news. “I mean, he managed to survive childhood, didn’t he? If that isn’t a sign of good luck, I don’t know what is.”
But some of his fellow lottery players aren’t quite as thrilled with the news. After all, the lottery is supposed to be a game of chance – something that even the playing field for everyone and gives us all a fair shot at the big bucks.
“That guy must have some kind of secret code or something,” muttered one disgruntled player. “I mean, there’s no other explanation for it. It just isn’t fair.”
As for what the winner plans on doing with his newfound fortune, he’s keeping it close to the chest for now.
“I haven’t really decided yet,” he said with a grin. “I might donate some to charity – you know, for a tax write-off. Or maybe I’ll just blow it all on a yacht and a couple of pool boys. We’ll see where the wind takes me.”
Whatever he decides to do with his cash, one thing is for certain – he’s officially living proof that lightning can strike twice. So for everyone else still clinging to their dreams of winning the big bucks, take heart – if this guy can do it twice, you never know what might happen to you.
And if you need us, we’ll be holed up in our cubicles, filling out lottery tickets and muttering curses at the guy two feet over who always seems to win the office pool.
