Reading is hard

Estimated read time 3 min read

Reading is hard. With so many distractions like TikTok, Netflix, and scrolling through social media, it’s a wonder anyone even has time to pick up a book these days. But apparently, one person in Pennsylvania had a book for so long it could have been a historical artifact.

According to reports, the Aston Public Library in Delaware County recently received a long-overdue book that had been checked out nearly 120 years ago. Yes, you read that right. 120 YEARS AGO.

The book, titled “Facts I Ought to Know About the Government of My Country,” was checked out in 1900 by a young man named James G. Barnwell. It’s unclear where Barnwell has been for the past century, but it’s safe to say he’s not in a hurry to return any other library books he may have borrowed.

When asked for a comment, the library director, Stephen Sarazin, said, “We’re thrilled to have the book back, even if it is a little late. Who knows, maybe this will inspire others to return their overdue books. We’ve even waived the late fee for Mr. Barnwell.”

Waived the late fee? Are you kidding me? 120 years overdue and the library is just going to let it slide? What kind of message does that send?

But wait, it gets even better. The library doesn’t even have the book anymore. That’s right, they shipped it off to the Historical Society of Pennsylvania without even getting a chance to flip through the pages.

I can only imagine what kind of groundbreaking information was contained in “Facts I Ought to Know About the Government of My Country.” Maybe it contained a secret chapter on how to avoid returning library books, or perhaps it was a detailed account of how the government was actually run by a secret society of lizard people.

Regardless, one thing’s for sure, Barnwell really missed out on some hefty fines. At the Aston Public Library, late fees are 25 cents per day, which would mean Barnwell would owe $10,950 in overdue fines alone. That’s not even including any processing fees or late fees that may have been added over the years.

But it’s not all bad news for the library. Thanks to this debacle, they’ve gained some much-needed publicity. In fact, they’re considering developing a new marketing campaign around the slogan “Come for the books, stay for the nostalgia.” Brilliant.

So, what can we learn from this story? First and foremost, return your library books on time. Second, maybe we should all take a page out of Barnwell’s book (pun intended) and start living life at our own pace. Who cares if we’re a little late to the game?

But most importantly, let’s take a moment to thank Mr. Barnwell for reminding us all that sometimes it’s okay to break the rules and follow your own path. Or, you know, you could just return your library books on time like a responsible adult. Your call.

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