Decatur, Illinois – In a shocking turn of events, the citizens of Decatur are scrambling for their lives as an exotic African cat is roaming the streets. Illinois Animal Control officials have warned residents to be on high alert and stay indoors until the serval, which resembles a ferocious kitty cat, is captured.
The serval, known for its long legs, is a wild cat native to Africa, and apparently, it must have missed its flight back home and decided to take a walkabout in the streets of Decatur. According to eye-witnesses, the serval seems to be enjoying its newfound freedom by taking leisurely strolls, soaking up some sun and stealing milk from local grocery stores.
The Decatur Police department has requested that individuals remain vigilant and report any sightings of the feisty feline before it causes any harm. “We’re urging people to stay safe and avoid trying to capture the serval on their own,” stated police chief, Tom Anderson. “This isn’t your typical house cat, and we don’t want any accidents occurring.”
In an effort to find the runaway wildcat, an immediate search team has been dispatched. This team comprises of well-trained wildlife experts and cat whisperers, equipped with catnip and milk to lure the serval back to where it belongs.
The sudden appearance of the serval has caused widespread panic in the community. Residents are afraid to leave their homes, and daycares have been shut down, leaving parents scrambling for childcare. Schools have been closed, and some businesses are sending their employees home early to avoid any confrontations with the wild cat.
The situation has become so dire that rumors are circulating that the National Guard is being deployed to hunt down the elusive cat. One anonymous source stated that they’ve added to the hunt by sending a group of highly trained cat burglars to capture the feline. However, this rumor is unconfirmed, and the National Guard has yet to comment.
In the meantime, officials continue their search for the serval by checking under cars, searching the sewers, and peeking inside kitty litter boxes. They urge individuals to keep their windows and doors locked, secure their garbage, and turn off any lights that may attract the wildcat.
Although it may seem like a minor issue, the appearance of the serval has caused mass hysteria in the city of Decatur. People are frightened, and some are even suggesting that the cat should be treated like other dangerous animals and euthanized. However, the Illinois Animal Control officials assure residents that they’re doing everything they possibly can to ensure the safety of the community and the serval.
There is no doubt that the current situation in Decatur is a cat-astrophe. Hopefully, the serval will eventually find its way back to the zoo, where it can roam safely. Until then, citizens of Decatur are advised to stay alert and keep their milk securely under lock and key.
