Journalists have been reporting on a scene of utter chaos and destruction after a semi truck carrying a potentially record-breaking catch of fish overturned on Interstate 5. In a city where getting fish for a reasonable price is as difficult as winning the lottery, it would be fair to say that the spill was nothing short of a disaster. I mean, think about it, all those succulent fishes gone to waste!
The accident caused severe traffic congestion as Washington State Department of Transportation crews worked to clear the fish spill. For miles, angry drivers were stuck in their cars, planning their protest on Twitter and ruing the wasted hours that they could have spent binge-watching Netflix.
The truck, which was carrying more fish than even Poseidon himself could count, overturned on the northbound lanes. Incredibly, the driver of the truck was fine and was soon seen strolling around, offering a free “I turned over a truckload of fish and all I got was this lousy T-shirt” shirt to anyone who asked.
The truck was said to be carrying a vast load of various fishes, including a massive haul of salmon, tunas, and rainbow trouts. The fish, now scattered all over the highway, caused a repulsive stench that caused a nauseating response to any human soul purely struggling to catch a whiff. While the recovery process is underway, the cleanup crews have decided to call in the world’s largest pack of seagulls to help themselves with the mess, proving that seagulls have gone from beach scavengers to potential game changers.
The cleanup process has been tense, and the authorities have advised drivers to take alternate routes if possible. If you’re the kind of person who enjoys the smell of rotting fish, then feel free to drive by. But if you’re like most people who enjoy clean air, no strong stenches, and having a healthy respiratory system, then we would strongly caution against it.
While the recovery continues, the stranded drivers have been busy trading tales of woe while they fight for their basic human right of breathing normal air. It was reported that some of the drivers demanded compensation for the time they wasted being stuck in traffic, while others still held their ground demanding for the truck driver’s license, perhaps for driving without a license to kill fish.
As of now, it’s too early to say if the spill will have any long-term consequences for the Washington fishing industry or how many fish will end up in the bellies of rodents, seagulls, or wild animals. We can only hope that whoever was supposed to receive that truckload of fish won’t be too disappointed and that karma will not knock on the door of the driver as well.
Overall, this reports a striking metaphor for the delicate balance between the forces of man and nature, the power of industrial transportation, and the awesomeness of marine creatures (that may belong more to the sea.) However, we are of a hopeful mind that the Washington roads will soon switch back to their original state, which most people assume is just normally filled with traffic cones, barricades, and never-ending frustration – minus the fishes, of course.