Seriously? A Deer on Ice? Are We Really Doing This Now?
Right, lets just pause for a moment and reflect on the pinnacle of human achievement: firefighters rescuing a deer that apparently decided to ice skate in New Jersey. Because apparently, that’s a legitimate use of taxpayer dollars these days. Multiple departments! Multiple! You know, those same departments who are probably battling understaffing issues, struggling to update equipment, and facing budget cuts? They were deployed to save a deer from its own incredibly poor life choices.
I mean, honestly. A deer. On ice. Did it not occur to this majestic creature that frozen water is, you know, not meant to be walked on? Was it lured out there by promises of artisanal moss and perfectly positioned photo opportunities? I’m genuinely trying to understand the logic here.
And the news coverage! The breathless reporting! Heroic rescue! Really? Its a deer! It probably wandered back into the woods and is now plotting its revenge on humanity for the embarrassment it caused. Meanwhile, actual emergencies are undoubtedly being slightly delayed because everyone’s busy fawning over Bambis near-death experience. I have so many questions, but frankly, I’m too exhausted to formulate them all. Just… seriously?
