A Seal in New Jersey? Seriously?
Right, because New Jersey didn’t have enough going on. Traffic? Existential dread about property taxes? The constant threat of a rogue pigeon attack? No, no, we needed this. A seal. Wandering. On our roads. Apparently, this aquatic mammal decided that the Garden State was just begging for an impromptu sightseeing tour.
You know, Im picturing it now: leisurely sauntering across Route 80, dodging minivans and disgruntled commuters. Probably pausing to admire a particularly vibrant patch of weeds growing through a crack in the asphalt. And then, the grand finale? A nap. Yes, a nap. Because apparently, disrupting traffic and causing general bewilderment wasnt exhausting enough.
I’m sure everyone involved – the bewildered drivers, the frantic wildlife officials, the seal itself—found this utterly charming. Just what we all needed: another layer of absurdity to add to the already overflowing pile of New Jersey weirdness. Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if it starts demanding a cappuccino and a copy of The Star-Ledger.
Its not even remotely surprising anymore. Anything is possible in this state. A seal on the highway? Par for the course. Just another Tuesday.
