Seriously? A Seal on Asphalt?
Right, because we dont have enough problems already. Apparently, while humanity grapples with existential threats – climate change, political upheaval, questionable fashion choices – a seal decided it needed a road trip. And not just any road trip; a leisurely nap in the middle of traffic. Because that’s precisely what our ecosystem requires. A marine mammal disrupting rush hour.
Honestly, Im struggling to contain my astonishment. Did this creature consult a map? Did it check for traffic reports? Was there a tiny little seal GPS device involved? Or did it simply think, You know what would be amazing? Blocking vehicular movement and potentially causing several accidents! Yes, let’s do that!
And of course, we needed the Marine Mammal Stranding Center to intervene. Bless their hearts, those dedicated individuals who now have to rescue a seal from its bizarre decision-making process. Im sure they were thrilled to add “seal relocation” to their already overflowing list of duties.
Look, I appreciate conservation efforts as much as the next person (maybe less at this point), but could we perhaps encourage our wildlife to choose slightly more conventional resting places? A beach? The ocean? Literally anywhere that doesn’t involve obstructing commuter routes would be fantastic. Is that too much to ask? Apparently it is.
