Natures Tiny Tyrants: Because, Of Course They Did
Seriously? Wild turkeys? Chasing a UPS driver? In Connecticut? Is this real life anymore? I swear, every headline these days is just another layer of absurdity piled on top of the already mountainous pile of… everything. We’re all supposed to be evolving, reaching for the stars, achieving enlightenment – and what do we get? A feathered menace terrorizing a delivery person.
Its not even surprising at this point. The animals are clearly taking over. Theyve seen us fumble with our avocado toast, witnessed our obsession with cat videos, and decided, rightly so, that they are in charge now. And what’s the UPS driver supposed to do? Wrestle a turkey? File a formal complaint with the Department of Ornithology? Probably just stand there, blinking, while these feathered overlords strut their stuff.
And lets be honest, it’s probably hilarious for everyone watching from afar – except, you know, the poor guy trying to deliver packages. I bet he gets a bonus now: Successfully navigated a flock of aggressive turkeys. It’s just…peak modern existence, isn’t it? A perfect encapsulation of how utterly ridiculous things have become. Just another Tuesday in the suburbs.
