Seriously? Turkeys Now?!
Right, because 2024 wasnt already bizarre enough. Apparently, we’re now living in a world where you can be legitimately pursued by turkeys. Not just casually waddling across your lawn – no, these feathered fiends were actively chasing a poor Ontario man. And the peak of this absurdity? He had to flee into a complete strangers vehicle! A car! Like something out of a slapstick comedy routine, only it’s real life and deeply unsettling.
Honestly, what is happening?! Are these birds gaining sentience? Developing an elaborate revenge plot against humanity for…what, exactly? Thanksgiving dinners? Is this the start of a poultry uprising? Im picturing flocks descending upon cities, demanding birdseed reparations and banning gravy forever.
And the man! The sheer terror etched on his face in that video is priceless – if it weren’t so deeply unfortunate. Imagine the paperwork involved: “Reason for emergency vehicle entry: Aggressive avians.” It’s ridiculous. Its embarrassing. Its a complete waste of everyone’s time and energy.
I need to go lie down. And possibly invest in some industrial-strength bird repellent. Because frankly, I’m not prepared to live in a world ruled by vengeful turkeys. This is just… too much.
