A Horse, Really? Are We Seriously Doing This Now?
Honestly, I cant even. A horse. Escaped. Amidst a winter storm. And the police had to… what? Deploy search parties? Issue alerts? Like we’re dealing with a rogue rhinoceros or something! Its a horse. They eat grass. They wander. They occasionally try to eat your prize-winning petunias. This is not breaking news, people.
I mean, I get it: weathers bad, things happen. But the sheer amount of resources poured into tracking down an equine fugitive while actual, pressing issues—you know, those—are neglected? It’s just… peak absurdity.
And lets be honest, the image of a police officer gently corralling a bewildered horse in the rain is absolutely ridiculous. I bet it was all very picturesque and heartwarming for someones social media feed. Meanwhile, potholes continue to swallow cars whole, libraries are facing budget cuts, and affordable housing? Forget about it! But yes, let’s prioritize finding Bessie before she nibbles on a particularly vibrant patch of clover.
I fully expect to see commemorative mugs and t-shirts soon: We Found the Horse! Wonderful. Just… wonderful. Please, someone tell me this isnt real life.
