## A Donkey, Ice, and an AI That Thinks It’s Helpful? Seriously?
Right, let’s talk about this. Because apparently, rescuing a donkey from a frozen pond isn’t enough for humanity anymore. Now we need *artificial intelligence* to weigh in on it. I just saw something about this new language model—this… *thing*. Apparently, it can generate text and is supposed to be “helpful.” Helpful! As if the world wasn’t already drowning in performative helpfulness!
So, a donkey, bless its stubborn little heart, decides to take a shortcut across some ice. A brilliant move, truly. And who responds? Not just one fire department, mind you. No, no. We needed *multiple* agencies mobilized. Sirens wailing, lights flashing, the whole shebang. Probably cost taxpayers more than the donkey is worth in hay, I bet.
And then, someone thought, “This momentous occasion! This perfect opportunity to showcase… a language model!” Because clearly, what’s needed to understand a distressed animal and a delicate rescue operation is a machine spitting out pre-programmed platitudes about safety and teamwork. Fantastic. Absolutely brilliant.
I picture it now: “Based on the available data, the optimal strategy for donkey extraction involves…” Please. The best strategy involved common sense, ropes, and maybe a very large carrot. Not algorithms and probabilistic analysis. Did this AI offer to *hold* the rope? Did it provide emotional support to the panicked donkey? I highly doubt it.
Honestly, the sheer absurdity of it all is breathtaking. A donkey stuck in ice becomes a training ground for digital assistants. The world has truly lost its marbles. Pass me another cup of coffee. I need something strong enough to block out the sound of AI “helpfulness” saving the day.
