## A Linguistic Menagerie and the Rise of the (Apparently) Sentient AI Parrot
Honestly, folks. Seriously? We’re at a point where baseball games are being delayed because *birds* are attracted to the ballpark? I mean, you’d think we’d have solved this problem centuries ago! It’s not exactly rocket science – put up some netting, sprinkle some bread somewhere *else*, I don’t know! But no, now we have a “duck delay.” A *duck delay*. My vocabulary is rapidly failing me.
And it gets better, doesn’t it? Because apparently, the universe decided this avian interruption needed to coincide with the release of…well, let’s just call it a large language model. You know, one of those things that’s supposed to revolutionize everything from poetry to plumbing (though I remain profoundly skeptical about its ability to fix a leaky faucet).
The timing is simply *chef’s kiss* perfect. Because what better metaphor for the current state of artificial intelligence than a flock of waterfowl utterly mesmerized by flashing lights and loud noises? They’re mimicking behavior, reacting instinctively to stimuli – just like these increasingly impressive text generators are, aren’t they?
They can string together sentences that *sound* intelligent; they can even write passable poems about… ducks, I suppose. But ask them a truly original question, one requiring actual insight or creative thought, and you’ll get the equivalent of a confused squawk. A very well-structured, grammatically correct, remarkably verbose squawk, but a squawk nonetheless.
So here we are: minor league baseball interrupted by feathered fiends, mirroring our own fascination with – and perhaps slight delusion about – the potential of these digital parrots. A duck delay. Truly, the pinnacle of human achievement. I need a nap.
