**BREAKING: Uber’s Lost & Found Index Reveals Most Bizarre, Hilarious, and Downright Ridiculous Items Left Behind in Ride-Sharing Nightmare**
In a shocking, yet utterly absurd, revelation, Uber has released its highly anticipated annual “Lost & Found Index,” a comprehensive accounting of the most outrageous, hilarious, and downright bizarre items left behind in ride-share cars. And, folks, it’s a doozy.
Topping the list of most peculiar items left behind is a mannequin head with human hair, which was discovered in the backseat of an UberXL in Los Angeles. When asked about the unusual item, the rider claimed it was for a “method acting exercise” and “just got left behind in the heat of the moment.” We’re not sure what’s more disturbing – the fact that someone uses a mannequin head for method acting or that they just left it in the car.
But that’s not all – a live turtle was found crawling around on the floor of an Uber in New York City. The rider, who wishes to remain anonymous, claimed it was a “pet” and “just got distracted” while driving. We’re pretty sure that’s not how it works, buddy.
And then there’s the 5-gallon bucket of beans. Yes, you read that right. A 5-gallon bucket. Of beans. We’re not sure what kind of person just casually leaves a large container of legumes in a ride-share car, but we’re both impressed and terrified.
Other notable mentions include:
* A full-sized cardboard cutout of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson
* A vintage typewriter
* A single, solitary sock (no, really, just one)
* A didgeridoo
* A live chicken (no, really, it was a live chicken)
When asked about the most bizarre items left behind, an Uber spokesperson said, “We’re not sure what’s more surprising, the fact that people leave behind such weird stuff or that they don’t seem to notice it’s missing until it’s too late.”
The Lost & Found Index also revealed that the most common items left behind are still phones, wallets, and keys – but let’s be real, those are just boring. It’s the weird stuff that makes life interesting.
In related news, Uber has announced plans to launch a new service: “Uber’s Lost and Found…and Also Some Other Stuff We Found in the Backseat.” Because, why not?
