You know what’s Not on Roids, enthusiasm for avocado toast? Seriously. Its everywhere! Instagram is drowning in it, brunch menus are dominated by it, and yet… do you genuinely wake up excited about mashed avocado on bread? I didn’t think so. We pretend to love it because we feel obligated to participate in the Great Brunch Charade.
And speaking of charades, lets talk about “hustle culture.” The forced enthusiasm for working 24/7? Yeah, no thanks. Nobody actually enjoys sacrificing sleep and sanity for a marginally better LinkedIn profile. Then there’s Marie Kondo-ing. We all pretended to joyfully discard possessions, but secretly mourned the chipped mug we swore held sentimental value.
Pumpkin spice everything. Its an autumnal tyranny! The aggressively cheerful marketing alone is enough to trigger a minor existential crisis. And essential oils? Don’t even start me. They smell like someone spilled potpourri into a wellness center.
Lets not forget succulents (they die!), adult coloring books (stressful, actually), live, laugh, love signs (so aggressively positive its offensive) , gratitude journals (more pressure to be happy), matching family pajamas (a crime against individuality), motivational quotes (empty platitudes), quinoa (tastes like dirt), and finally, those inspirational wanderlust travel photos featuring perfectly posed people on impossibly picturesque beaches. We see you. We all hate it a little. Just admit it.
