Seriously? A Wallaby? Really, Colorado?
Let’s just pause for a moment and collectively sigh. Apparently, were now at the stage of civilization where a misplaced marsupial – and I use the term kangaroo loosely because it was, predictably, a wallaby – becomes international news. A wallaby! Like, congratulations, Colorado, you managed to briefly distract us from actual problems with…a fluffy, hopping critter that clearly escaped from someone’s backyard zoo.
And of course, this isnt just any escapee; it has an Instagram account. Because that’s what’s important right now: documenting the chaotic absurdity of a wallaby roaming free for internet clout. I can practically hear the hashtags forming in real-time: ColoradoWallaby EscapeArtist MarsupialShenanigans. Its just…peak ridiculousness, isn’t it?
Sheriff’s deputies were dispatched! Deputies! To wrangle a wallaby! While genuine concerns about climate change, affordable housing, and the impending doom of… well, everything… are quietly simmering in the background. We’re prioritizing a photo opportunity with an animal that probably just wanted to graze on some fresh grass.
Im not even mad. Im just…tired. Tired of the performative nature of everything. Give me a break! Let the wallaby be. Maybe it’ll find its way home, or maybe well all collectively forget about this in three days and move onto the next viral distraction. Please, let it be the latter.
