Seriously? A Wallaby at Walmart?!
Honestly, is this what we’ve come to? I cant even walk into a store to buy paper towels without encountering some bizarre wildlife spectacle now? A wallaby! A wallaby in New Jersey! Apparently, the existential dread of inflation and the sheer chaos of Black Friday wasnt enough for us. We needed an escaped marsupial adding to the general sense of bewilderment.
And get this – it was safely captured. Safely. As if that’s supposed to make up for the fact that a wild animal, clearly disoriented and probably terrified, decided Walmart was its preferred habitat. I bet someone took pictures. Of course they did! Its practically mandatory these days: bizarre event + smartphone = instant internet fame.
The sheer absurdity of it all! While we’re collectively struggling with the rising cost of everything, while people are genuinely facing hardship, a wallaby decides to grace us with its presence in a parking lot? And then, then, it returns! Like it was just popping back for milk and bread. Im not even surprised anymore. This is New Jersey. We’ve seen it all. Apparently, now we see escaped Australian wildlife casually strolling through the automotive section.
I need a nap. A very long nap. Possibly in Australia. Far away from wallabies and fluorescent lighting.
