A Horse? Really? At JFK?!
Seriously? A horse? At an airport? Im supposed to believe this is a newsworthy event? Apparently, Port Authority officers are now trained in equine wrangling alongside their duties of preventing… what exactly? Terrorist squirrels? Because clearly, a runaway horse presented a more pressing threat to national security than anything else happening right now.
And the “rushed into action” narrative? Please. I envision two individuals, probably already late for lunch, awkwardly shuffling toward a bewildered animal while attempting to look heroic. Look how brave we are! We’re dealing with…a horse!” The sheer absurdity of it all is almost too much to bear.
I bet the passengers were thrilled. Just picture it: “Honey, did you see the delayed flight announcement? No, silly, it was a horse!” This is what our tax dollars are supporting folks! Not infrastructure improvements, not solving actual problems… no, we get heartwarming stories about officers chasing down livestock.
It’s just…peak everything. The epitome of ridiculous priorities. Im sure the horse had a perfectly good explanation for its impromptu airport tour. Probably something along the lines of, You know what? I needed to see if they served hay at the gate.” Honestly, it makes more sense than anything else going on right now.
