**Massive Lizard Launches Campaign for Office Space at School Administration Building**
In what can only be described as the most dramatic entrance ever witnessed at a school administration building, a colossal lizard—yes, you read that correctly—has boldly decided to stake its claim right at the main entrance. Staff and visitors alike were thrilled to discover that their usual routine would now be accompanied by an unexpected scaly colleague.
The reptilian interloper, estimated to be the size of a small car, was first spotted lounging lazily on the welcome mat Tuesday morning, seemingly unimpressed by the steady flow of paperwork and bureaucratic small talk. Sources say the lizard showed little intention of moving, despite several polite requests from administration staff. In fact, it appeared to give an all-too-knowing blink to a frazzled receptionist trying to scan the building access cards.
Witnesses report that the lizard has quickly become a sort of unintentional mascot, offering a new kind of “security” that no CCTV system could hope to match. “I mean, forget security cameras,” one office worker commented. “Nothing says deterring unwanted visitors like a giant reptile staring you down.” The school’s IT department is reportedly considering installing a live feed just to monitor their new, cold-blooded sentinel.
The presence of the lizard has caused minor scheduling chaos, with meetings being delayed and scheduled around its nap times. One baffled principal remarked, “We were going to hold an early morning staff briefing, but the lizard seemed to be having some serious relaxation goals that day. We figured, who are we to interrupt a lizard’s meditation?”
Parents attempting to drop off paperwork found themselves engaging in an impromptu wildlife experience. Several reported trying—and failing—to maintain their composure as the lizard slowly crawled across the threshold, showing off scales that sparkled subtly in the fluorescent hallway lighting. A few claim the lizard nodded approvingly while inspecting the “Parent Parking Only” sign, as if mentally calculating its own designated parking spot.
Facilities management was not immediately available for comment but insiders suggest that attempts to relocate the lizard have been met with a distinct lack of cooperation. “It’s not like moving a pile of files,” one source lamented. “You can’t just call IT and ask them to reboot it.” The building’s janitorial team has reportedly resorted to doing their rounds with a mix of caution and a healthy dose of resignation.
In response to the surprise lizard residency, the school board has initiated emergency meetings to discuss the implications of having such a unique occupant. Preliminary proposals include naming the creature “Chief Lizard Officer” and issuing it an employee ID badge—complete with a photo that captures its best side, which, from all accounts, is every side.
While parents and staff grapple with this new “member of the team,” one thing is for certain: the school administration building will never be the same. And who knows? Perhaps this formidable creature was simply trying to remind everyone that sometimes, the real rulers of the school are not humans at all. After all, why settle for paperwork when you can have a lizardie overlord?
