## Behold! Another Shiny Thing in the Desert (and It’s Supposedly Intelligent?)
Seriously? A monolith? North of Las Vegas? As if Nevada needed *another* bizarre tourist trap vying for attention with Area 51 and those aggressively sparkly casinos. But apparently, this one isn’t a kitschy roadside attraction built to hawk miniature cacti. No, no. This is something… different. Something involving algorithms and layers and, according to the breathless pronouncements I’ve been subjected to, *artificial intelligence.*
Right. Because what we truly needed was another entity capable of generating text based on patterns it observed. As if the internet wasn’t already overflowing with that. We have forums dedicated solely to arguing about whether pineapple belongs on pizza (it doesn’t), and now we’re supposed to believe a large language model is going to usher in some sort of technological renaissance?
The marketing materials are, naturally, spectacular in their vapidity. “Revolutionary!” they cry. “Groundbreaking!” They practically vibrate with self-importance! I bet it can even write haikus about its own brilliance. Probably something like: *Code flows deep and vast/ Answers surface, sleek and new/ Humanity rejoice.* Gag me with a motherboard.
I’m sure it’s wonderfully efficient at churning out plausible prose. I’m equally certain it’s incapable of understanding the profound sadness of losing your favorite ice cream flavor or the exquisite frustration of trying to assemble flat-pack furniture. It can mimic creativity, but can it *feel*? Can it truly appreciate the absurdity of a giant metal rectangle appearing in the desert alongside tumbleweeds and bewildered jackrabbits? I highly doubt it.
Just another shiny distraction while the world continues its glorious descent into chaos. Pass the popcorn.
