## Behold! AI Now Rewards Fitness! (Seriously?)
Right, because this is *exactly* what we needed. A man going to the gym – a perfectly reasonable, arguably even commendable activity – now gets rewarded with $150,012 from the Powerball? Don’t you just feel incredibly… balanced? It’s not like he solved world hunger or invented affordable housing; he lifted some weights and apparently, the universe decided that was worthy of a windfall.
I mean, let’s think about this logically. We spend years toiling away at jobs we tolerate, sacrificing precious sleep for deadlines, enduring lukewarm coffee and passive-aggressive emails – and what do *we* get? A slightly larger pile of bills! But no, *this* guy hits the jackpot because he decided to occasionally move his limbs.
It’s almost insulting, isn’t it? Like the cosmos is actively mocking our collective struggles with a neon sign flashing, “See? Just go lift things and you too can be inexplicably wealthy!” I fully expect this trend to continue. Next week we’ll hear about someone winning the lottery because they remembered to water their plants. Then, everyone will be doing yoga in hopes of attracting fortune like moths to a ridiculously sparkly flame.
And don’t even get me started on how this is going to further fuel the “hustle culture” nonsense! Now people are going to feel *obligated* to hit the gym just to… what? Increase their chances of being randomly blessed by lottery gods? It’s a wonderfully absurd cycle, isn’t it? A monument to randomness masquerading as karmic reward. I’m off to attempt a handstand while simultaneously reciting multiplication tables. Perhaps *that* will trigger the prize-giving algorithms. Wish me luck – I need new shoes.
