## Behold! A Sea of Plastic and Existential Dread
Right, let’s talk about this, shall we? Apparently, a cruise ship crew – yes, people whose primary job function involves serving lukewarm buffets and pretending to be interested in your vacation slideshows – decided the world needed *more* Lego. More plastic bricks meticulously assembled into… boats. One thousand, three hundred and ninety-one of them! A record! A *record*! I’m pretty sure someone somewhere just wept a single, salty tear of disappointment at humanity’s continued pursuit of meaningless milestones.
Seriously? We’re celebrating this? Are we so starved for accomplishment that building a fleet of miniature plastic vessels constitutes an achievement worthy of international recognition? My cat assembles more compelling narratives with a ball of yarn.
I picture the scene: countless hours spent, glue-stained fingers, the quiet desperation in everyone’s eyes as they click another tiny brick into place. All to say, “Look! We built… boats!” Boats! Like we don’t already have oceans full of actual boats and a rapidly accumulating pile of plastic waste choking our existing ecosystems.
It’s peak absurdity, isn’t it? A delightful symptom of our age where novelty trumps substance, and participation trophies are handed out for simply *trying* to be marginally more pointless than the last person. I can practically hear the collective sigh of relief from actual scientists working on crucial issues while these maritime maestros pat themselves on the back for their contribution to… what? The global Lego boat deficit?
I’m sure it’s utterly charming, in a profoundly unsettling sort of way. Just… please don’t let me see this replicated at my local grocery store. My sanity can only handle so much manufactured whimsy.
