## A Fine Display of Equine Panic and Corporate Serenity
Oh, *splendid*. Military horses galloping through central London. Really, what could be more picturesque? It’s not every day one gets to witness a centuries-old tradition – the tradition of highly-trained animals being utterly terrified by the relentless hum of… progress. Apparently, some construction noise, that glorious symphony of jackhammers and reversing trucks we all adore so much, managed to frighten a team of noble steeds into a spontaneous urban safari. And now, according to official statements, they’re “closely observed.” How reassuring!
One imagines a panel of very serious individuals nodding sagely as they meticulously monitor the horses’ every twitch, their every whinny. “Yes,” they murmur, “they appear to be… breathing.” Groundbreaking analysis, truly. We must all feel profoundly comforted that someone is paying attention, even if the incident itself was preventable with a modicum of common sense and maybe, just *maybe*, not conducting industrial-scale demolition next to where highly sensitive animals are kept.
It’s marvelous how effortlessly institutions manage to deflect any semblance of responsibility. “Cared for,” they say. As opposed to what? Neglected? Abandoned in a ditch somewhere? The implication is that these majestic creatures are receiving the very pinnacle of equine pampering, which I’m sure includes tiny bespoke helmets and miniature therapy sessions about the inherent trauma of being startled by loud noises.
And let’s be honest, it all just feels… perfectly symbolic. A carefully curated image of stoicism and tradition shattered by the blunt force of modern ambition. Because really, isn’t that what we’re always striving for? To bulldoze our way through anything standing in the path of “innovation,” even if those things are literal horses. Absolutely brilliant. Just splendidly, wonderfully brilliant.
