**LOCAL GRANNY CAUSES A STIR ON 104th BIRTHDAY: WOMAN’S BIZARRE BIRTHDAY WISH ENDS IN HANDCUFFS**
In a shocking turn of events, Agnes Jenkins, a feisty 104-year-old New Yorker, celebrated her birthday in a way that will be remembered for generations to come. The spry nonagenarian marked the occasion by crossing off a major bucket list item: getting arrested.
According to eyewitnesses, Jenkins, a lifelong resident of Manhattan, calmly walked into the 14th precinct police station, looked the officer in the eye, and declared, “I’m here to get arrested. It’s on my bucket list.” The bewildered officer, taken aback by the centenarian’s audacity, politely asked if she was sure, to which Jenkins responded, “I’m positive! I’ve always wanted to experience the thrill of being hauled away in handcuffs.”
Without hesitation, the officer obliged, cuffing Jenkins and leading her to a cell. As she was being booked, Jenkins quipped, “This is the most excitement I’ve had since the flapper days!”
The jail’s PA system crackled to life as the warden announced, “We have a special birthday girl in cell block C. Anyone bringing cake?” A spontaneous celebration ensued, with officers and inmates alike gathering to sing “Happy Birthday” to the giddy Jenkins.
When asked why she chose to celebrate her birthday behind bars, Jenkins explained, “I’ve done everything else – traveled, married, raised kids, outlived my husband… I figured, why not try getting arrested? It’s about time I experienced the thrill of a perp walk!”
Jenkins was released on her own recognizance, with the warden remarking, “We’re just glad she didn’t ask to spend the night. We don’t get many seniors requesting a jailhouse staycation!”
As she exited the station, Jenkins grinned mischievously and said, “That was a real blast…literally! Now, where’s my next bucket list item…skydiving, perhaps?”
