**BREAKING: RACCOON DOG ON THE LOOSE IN WALES, RESIDENTS ADVISED TO LOCK UP THEIR SNACKS**
Cardiff, Wales – In a shocking turn of events, a rogue raccoon dog has escaped from a secret government laboratory and is currently roaming free in the countryside of Wales. The creature, described as “a cross between a raccoon and a dog, but way more mischievous” has left authorities scrambling to track it down.
According to eyewitnesses, the raccoon dog, whose name is allegedly “Rocky” and has a fondness for Barry Manilow music, was last seen rummaging through a farmer’s market in the town of Llanfairpwllgwyngyll, causing chaos and destruction in its wake.
“It’s like it has a PhD in causing trouble,” said local resident, Gwen ap Rhys. “I was just trying to enjoy my Sunday morning, and then suddenly, this… this… thing appears out of nowhere and starts making off with my basket of freshly baked Bara Brith!”
The Welsh government has issued a statement urging residents to remain calm, but to also be on high alert for any signs of the raccoon dog’s presence.
“We understand that this is a worrying time for the people of Wales, but we assure you that we are doing everything in our power to catch this cunning creature and restore order to our fair nation,” said a spokesperson for the Welsh government. “In the meantime, we advise residents to keep a close eye on their snacks, as Rocky is known to have a weakness for crisps and a penchant for knocking over trash cans.”
As the search for Rocky continues, residents are advised to report any sightings to the authorities immediately. In the meantime, local businesses are capitalizing on the situation, selling “I survived the Great Welsh Raccoon Dog Invasion” t-shirts and souvenirs.
**IF YOU SEE ROCKY, DO NOT APPROACH HIM. CALL THE AUTHORITIES IMMEDIATELY. AND FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS WELSH, KEEP YOUR SNACKS SAFE!**
