**BREAKING: Gator on the Scales (Literally!)**
In a bizarre case of reptilian obesity, a gargantuan alligator has been discovered living behind a former Coca-Cola plant in Florida, and it’s a real “gator-astrophe”! The behemoth reptile, estimated to be over 12 feet long and a whopping 427 pounds, has been put on a strict diet to shed some of those extra pounds.
According to eyewitnesses, the alligator, affectionately known as “Gatorzilla,” has been spotted lurking behind the abandoned plant, subsisting on a diet of discarded soda cans, pizza crusts, and the occasional unsuspecting tourist who wandered too close.
“I was just trying to get a selfie with the old plant,” said local resident, Jimmy Johnson, “when suddenly, this massive gator emerged from the shadows, its belly jiggling like a bowl of Jell-O! I high-tailed it out of there faster than a can of Coke on a hot summer day!”
Concerned wildlife experts were called to the scene, and after a thorough examination, they determined that Gatorzilla’s excessive weight was putting its health at risk. “We’re talking about a serious case of gator-ese,” said Dr. Jane Smith, a leading expert in reptilian obesity. “If we don’t get this gator on a diet, it could lead to a host of problems, including – but not limited to – diabetes, high blood pressure, and a severely diminished supply of snacks.”
Enter the Gator Diet Plan 3000, a revolutionary new program designed to help Gatorzilla shed those unwanted pounds. The diet consists of a strict regimen of leafy greens, low-calorie aquatic plants, and a special brand of gator-sized Slim Jims.
“We’re confident that with this diet, Gatorzilla will be back to its svelte, swamp-stalking self in no time,” said Dr. Smith. “And who knows, maybe it’ll even start a gator-sized weight loss movement – after all, who wouldn’t want to trade in their spare tire for a six-pack… of abs, that is!”
In related news, Coca-Cola officials have announced plans to launch a new line of low-calorie soft drinks, specifically designed for the modern gator on-the-go. Stay tuned for further updates on Gatorzilla’s weight loss journey and the latest developments in the world of reptilian wellness!
