TOKYO, JAPAN – In a bizarre incident that has left authorities scratching their heads, a hapless climber who was airlifted from near the peak of Japan’s iconic Mount Fuji just last week has been rescued for a SECOND TIME in a stunning display of determination… or stupidity.
According to eyewitnesses, 32-year-old Hiroshi Nakamura was spotted stumbling down the mountain, looking like a “zombie in hiking boots” just four days after being medevaced to safety with severe altitude sickness.
“I was just enjoying my onsen soak when I saw him stumbling towards me, muttering something about ‘just one more summit selfie’,” said fellow hiker Yui Tanaka. “I thought to myself, ‘Hasn’t this guy learned his lesson yet?’ Apparently not.”
Police say Nakamura was rescued for the second time after he failed to heed warnings from his family, friends, and apparently, common sense. “He told us he just couldn’t resist the allure of the mountain and wanted to ‘feel the rush’ again,” said a flabbergasted rescue team member.
When asked why he returned to the mountain despite his previous ordeal, Nakamura replied, “I just really love ramen, and I heard there’s a great spot near the summit with an amazing view… and a souvenir shop with a ‘I survived Mount Fuji (twice)’ t-shirt”.
The rescue team was called in after Nakamura’s second attempt at conquering the mountain resulted in him getting lost… again. “We’re starting to think he’s secretly a masochist or a YouTube influencer trying to get more views,” said a rescue team spokesperson.
Miraculously, Nakamura was rescued for the second time and is currently being treated for dehydration, embarrassment, and what appears to be a severe case of “mountain-induced stupidity”.
When asked if he had any comment for his fans, Nakamura simply shook his head and muttered, “Next time, I’ll bring a GPS… and a sense of humor”.
