In a touching tribute to the architectural wonder that is Hooters, a candlelight vigil was held outside the soon-to-be-demolished restaurant in West Virginia.
The vigil, which took place on a brisk Thursday evening, was organized by the local chapter of the “Save Our Sleazy Eateries” movement. Supporters gathered in front of the iconic Hooters sign, holding candles and singing mournful hymns in honor of the impending loss.
“This is a sad day for our community,” lamented vigil attendee and Hooters enthusiast, Larry Johnson. “For years, Hooters has been a beacon of hope and joy in our otherwise mundane lives. And now, it’s all going to be ripped away from us.”
Since the announcement of Hooters’ impending demolition, the restaurant has seen a surge in business from loyal fans trying to soak up as much of the atmosphere as possible before the bulldozer arrives.
“My grandson and I have been coming here every Sunday for the past decade,” said 85-year-old Hooters regular, Mildred Thompson. “It’s our favorite spot for hot wings and scintillating conversation with the waitresses.”
But not everyone shares the sentimentality for the iconic eatery. Critics point to the overtly-sexualized dress code for waitresses and argue that its existence only serves to perpetuate harmful gender stereotypes.
“This is no loss for society,” argued feminist activist, Brenda Reed. “Hooters represents everything that’s wrong with the way we view women. I, for one, am glad to see it go.”
Despite the back-and-forth debate about Hooters’ cultural significance, the vigil remained a somber affair. Attendees shared fond memories of the restaurant and bid it a final farewell with a moment of silence.
As the candles flickered out and the crowd dispersed, many were left wondering what could possibly replace the cultural icon that was Hooters. Some suggested a vegan cafe or a community center for underprivileged youth.
But perhaps the most promising idea came from local businessman, Frank Reynolds.
“I’m thinking of opening a new restaurant in the same spot,” Reynolds mused. “I’m calling it ‘Hooters 2.0.’ It’s going to be a family-friendly place with all the same great food, minus the scantily-clad waitresses. I think it’s going to be a huge hit.”
Only time will tell if Reynolds’ vision for the future of the Hooters spot will come to fruition. But for now, we bid farewell to the infamous establishment, with a heavy heart and a slight craving for chicken wings.
