Washington Woman Sets World Record for Crocheting Non-Stop for 34 Hours and 7 Minutes
In a stunning feat of endurance, Jane Smith, a 37-year-old woman from Washington state, has crocheted for a jaw-dropping 34 hours and 7 minutes. Her accomplishment has earned her a place in the record books, as she has beaten the previous world record for continuous crocheting by a full three minutes.
Smith’s accomplishment was not without its challenges. She admits that her hands felt like they were going to fall off by hour 12, and by hour 20 her eyeballs were dried out and itchy from staring at the yarn. But despite these obstacles, she soldiered on, fueled by coffee and a deep desire to prove that she was the best crocheter around.
“Frankly, I always knew I was destined for greatness,” Smith said as she took a well-deserved break. “When I was a little girl, I used to crochet for hours on end. My mom would have to pry the hook out of my hand just so I could go to bed. I guess I just never lost that passion.”
Smith’s accomplishment has sent shockwaves through the crocheting world, with many of her fellow enthusiasts expressing awe at her dedication and skill.
“I mean, 34 hours? That’s insane,” said Susan Johnson, a fellow Washington state crocheter. “I once tried to go for 12 hours straight and ended up with a massive cramp in my hand and a severe case of eye strain. Jane is a true inspiration.”
Others, however, have questioned the validity of Smith’s accomplishment, pointing out that crocheting for that long can’t possibly be healthy.
“Look, I get it, she’s passionate about crocheting,” said Dr. James Miller, a specialist in repetitive stress injuries. “But it’s not like she cured cancer or anything. All she did was potentially cause some serious lifelong damage to her hands and eyes. Is that really worth it?”
Despite the naysayers, Smith remains resolute in her dedication to the craft. She plans to take a well-deserved nap and then start crocheting again, this time with the goal of beating her own record.
“I’m not gonna lie, I’m pretty sore right now,” she said. “But there’s nothing like the feeling of pulling off something like this. I’m on top of the world.”
So congratulations to Jane Smith for her impressive accomplishment. And if you need a scarf or a beanie, you know who to call.
