Lexington CVB’s Bold Move to Attract Aliens
In a bid to put their city on the map, the Lexington Convention and Visitors Bureau has gone to unprecedented lengths to attract tourists from another galaxy by using an infrared laser to beam a message into space.
Forget inviting humans from other cities or countries – that’s just too basic. The lads over at the CVB have set their sights on inviting extraterrestrial life to their humble abode. Because who wouldn’t want to travel lightyears across the universe to visit a place filled with cornfields and horses?
The message, which was beamed using a powerful infrared laser from a local observatory, reportedly took a mere 1.3 seconds to travel past the moon into deep space. And what did it say, you ask? The message read, “One small step for man, one giant leap for horses. Come find us in Lexington.”
The aliens are probably already making plans to beam down to Kentucky’s second-largest city, eager to witness the beauty of Kentucky’s Bluegrass Region. They might even come to taste the finest bourbon in the world – assuming aliens even have the liver enzymes to drink in the first place.
According to a statement by Mary Quinn Ramer, President of VisitLEX, “if we’re friendly and welcoming, maybe they’ll choose to land here”. Right, because there’s nothing friendlier and more welcoming than a city that uses a frickin’ laser to invite an alien invasion.
It’s no secret that the pandemic has taken a toll on the tourism industry, but expect travelers from other galaxies to provide a much-needed boost to the industry. Who wouldn’t want to visit Earth as their first vacation destination after being in lockdown on their home planet for centuries, right?
And don’t worry folks, John Anttonen, the president of the Lexington Astronomical Society, assures us that the message “was not a waste of time or resources.” Because spending thousands of dollars on laser technology and hours of planning to send a message into oblivion is apparently not a waste of time or resources.
In an era where climate change, poverty, and political crises dominate global news, it’s almost refreshing to see a city take up such a noble cause as inviting aliens to their hometown. I mean, who needs to address real-world problems when you can have the stars at your fingertips?
To be fair, it’s not entirely clear if the message will even reach any intelligent life form. But hey, don’t tell that to those who worked hard to make this happen – let them dream. So, to the aliens out there, if you’re reading this, be sure to pack your bags and head to Lexington – we hear it is the ideal destination for a vacation that’s out of this world.
