Dept. of Agriculture Saves Christmas: Santa’s Reindeer Cleared for U.S. Flight
Attention all citizens of the United States: You can finally breathe a sigh of relief! The U.S. Department of Agriculture has granted clearance to Santa Claus’ reindeer for their annual flight into the country. That’s right, no need to panic about the potential violation of animal import laws or Santa ending up behind bars.
We know what you’re thinking: how did these beloved creatures of the North Pole get past the red tape of our government? Well, it’s simple really. The USDA allegedly conducted a thorough inspection of each and every reindeer to ensure that they were in good health and not carrying any unwanted diseases. Because nothing says Christmas like the USDA approving of your transportation methods.
But wait, there’s even more good news. Rumor has it that the USDA will be sending their own agents to escort Santa and his team of reindeer during their flight. Because we all know, nothing is more important than ensuring the safety and well-being of fictional characters traveling across international borders.
Of course, some may argue that this decision sets a dangerous precedent for other mythical beings hoping to enter the country. What’s next, clearance for the Tooth Fairy and her sack of teeth? Or perhaps a green card for the Easter Bunny and his basket of chocolate eggs?
But fear not, dear citizens. The USDA has reportedly assured the public that this decision was made solely for the benefit of the millions of children who eagerly await Santa’s arrival on Christmas Eve. Because let’s be real, if these little ones were to wake up on Christmas morning to find that Santa had been deported, there would undoubtedly be chaos on the streets.
So, for those who were once worried about the possibility of Rudolph and his buddies being confined to quarantine, it seems that the Christmas magic has prevailed. The USDA has saved the day and in turn, saved Christmas. After all, what better way to spread holiday cheer than by ensuring the safe passage of Santa and his team of trusty reindeer?
In conclusion, we must thank the USDA for their vigilance in ensuring the timely arrival of Santa Claus. No need to worry about the reindeer, folks. They’re in good hands. And who knows, maybe in the future we’ll see other fantastical creatures granted clearance to enter the country. Until then, let’s all sit back and relax as we await the arrival of the man in red and his flying companions. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good flight!
