AUSTRALIAN SURFER RIDES RECORD-BREAKING 43.6-FOOT WAVE
In what is being hailed as a historic moment in the world of surfing, Australian surfer, Joe Blow, has ridden a record-breaking 43.6-foot wave off the coast of Sydney. You read that right, ladies and gentlemen. 43.6 feet! That’s like the size of a five-story building. And we thought crushing our fear of heights was a big deal.
The wave, which was the result of a rare weather phenomenon known as a ‘monster swell,’ was witnessed by only a handful of onlookers who were probably too busy staring in awe to even remember to take pictures. But, luckily for us, Blow had a camera mounted on his surfboard to capture the incredible feat. Because, let’s be honest, if it’s not on Instagram, did it really happen?
The video footage, which has since gone viral, shows Blow riding the wave with what can only be described as an effortless cool. He made it look so easy, it’s almost as if he’d done it before. In fact, rumors are already circulating that this may not be his first time surfing such a giant wave. But we’ll leave that to the conspiracy theorists.
In the wake of his achievement, tributes have been pouring in from all corners of the surfing world. Kelly Slater, the 11-time world champion, tweeted: “Wow. That’s insane. Congrats, Joe Blow. You just raised the game.” We don’t know about you, but we can’t wait to see what Slater tries to pull off now. Maybe he’ll surf through a tornado. Or maybe even around the world. Who knows?
But as much as we’d like to celebrate Blow’s accomplishment, we can’t help but wonder if he’s just spoiled it for the rest of us regular surfers. I mean, what’s the point of even trying to ride a wave if we know we’ll never be able to come close to that kind of record? It’s like trying to run a marathon when Usain Bolt is in the race. There’s no point. Might as well just stick to swimming in the kiddie pool.
Nonetheless, we’re sure there are already hordes of thrill-seekers out there who are practicing their moves and waiting for the next ‘monster swell’ to hit. And who knows, maybe one day, they too will be able to ride a gigantic wave and have their name in the record books. Or their face on the internet.
Until that day comes, though, we can all just sit back, watch the videos of Joe Blow’s incredible feat, and dream about what it must be like to be that cool. Or maybe just take up a new hobby. Like knitting. We hear it’s very soothing.
