Chicago, Los Angeles top list of ‘Rattiest Cities’ in U.S.
In a bone-chilling revelation that’s sure to make the skin of many Americans crawl, two major cities have made it to the top of a list that nobody ever wants to top- the list of ‘Rattiest Cities’ in the United States.
And the winners are- drumroll, please- Chicago and Los Angeles! Yes, folks. These cities have proven that they pack in more rats than any other city in the nation.
The findings were announced by the good folks over at Orkin, the pest control company that conducted the survey. They used data collected from rodent treatments from the previous year and came up with a top 50 rat-infested cities in the US, with Chicago and Los Angeles taking the top two spots.
Now, I don’t know what kind of honors these cities usually like to take pride in, but I’m pretty sure they won’t mind sharing this trophy with each other!
The thought of rats swarming around in the streets, alleys, and seemingly everywhere in between is so unappetizing and sickening that it’s sure to make anyone’s stomach churn. But hey, that’s just a small price to pay for the incomparable charm and beauty of these great cities, right?
I mean, who wouldn’t want to enjoy some tasty deep-dish pizza while fighting off swarms of rats that threaten to jump on us at any moment? Or walk around in the warm sunshine of Los Angeles, keeping a careful eye out for the pesky rodents that might run up our legs or, even worse, bite us? It’s all just part of life in these iconic locations!
The pest control experts have cited various reasons for Chicago and Los Angeles’ rodent problem, including their large populations and dense urban areas. But let’s be honest; we all know the real reason behind this plague of rats.
It’s because these darned rodents love the fantastic lifestyle that these cities offer! I mean, what’s not to like? The bright lights, the blistering cold, the scorching heat, the rundown slums, the overcrowded subway stations, and the overflowing garbage cans- it’s all just an epic playground for these furry little creatures.
Now, some of you may be wondering about the citizens who have to live with this problem day in and day out. But hey, they’re tough folks, and they know how to deal with rats better than anyone else. They’ve learned to coexist with these creatures, treating them like their own little pets, visiting them in the alleys, feeding them from their own trash cans, and even naming them!
So, to the people of Chicago and Los Angeles, we say- congratulations! You’ve earned your spot on this prestigious list, and you should be proud of it.
And to the rest of us, let’s take heart in the fact that no matter how bad we think our own cities’ rat problems get, at least we’re not living in these two rat-infested nightmare cities that are showing no signs of changing anytime soon.
