Mint in Philadelphia.
“Four Men Arrested for Dime Heist: Plans to Create Giant Piggy Bank Scuppered!”
In an unbelievable turn of events, the FBI has managed to crack the case of a dime heist that took place earlier this year. Apparently, four geniuses thought it was a good idea to steal over two million dimes from a tractor-trailer!
The trailer, which had picked up the coins from the U.S. Mint in Philadelphia, was parked outside a Rite Aid pharmacy in Lancaster, Pennsylvania, when the heist took place. To their credit, the thieves had a well thought out plan which involved threatening the driver and his armed guard with guns. Unfortunately for them, their get-rich-quick scheme has quickly come to a screeching halt.
No one knows for sure what the thieves were planning to do with their new-found wealth, but our sources indicate that they were planning on creating the world’s largest piggy bank. Yes, you heard that right! These four men thought it would be wise to put all their eggs in one basket, or in this case, all their dimes into one giant piggy bank.
“Creativity comes in all shapes and sizes, including giant piggy banks,” says one of the thieves who agreed to speak to us on the condition of anonymity. “We were going to be famous for creating the world’s largest piggy bank. It was a golden opportunity that we simply couldn’t pass up.”
However, their plans were quickly scuppered when the FBI stepped in and arrested them for theft, conspiracy, and firearms offenses. The four men in custody have been identified as Angel Mojica Dominguez, 47, of Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, Alex Rivera, 35, and Eugenio Santiago-Hernandez, 34, both of Reading, Pennsylvania, and Joshua Cruz, 33, of Bronx, New York.
“Let this be a lesson to all aspiring piggy bank creators out there,” says an FBI spokesperson. “Crime does not pay, and especially not if you’re planning on creating a giant piggy bank with your loot.”
The dimes, which are worth a total of $200,000, have been recovered by the FBI. We can only imagine what their next plan would have been had they gotten their hands on the two million dimes. A giant-sized version of hopscotch might have been in the cards, or maybe even an attempt at the world’s largest game of jacks! Who knows? The possibilities were endless!
As expected, the Internet has been having a field day with the news, with users taking to social media to voice their opinions. One user tweeted, “Two million dimes can get you a lot of things, but apparently not common sense.” Another user chimed in saying, “I guess we’ll have to wait for the next dime heist to see what these geniuses come up with next.”
It remains to be seen what punishment the four thieves will be facing, but one thing is for sure – they won’t be creating that giant piggy bank anytime soon!
